Watching your Mom or Dad Get Married

Excited. That was the word I heard from Claire and Grady when they found out I asked Krista to marry me last fall. Over the next few months though, the real questions started coming my way.  Is she moving into our house? Is Evan moving in too? Does that mean he will be our step-brother? Can I still sleep in your bed at night when I’m scared?

At the heart of it, kids want to feel safe, secure, and loved. They don’t choose to get divorced, share time between their parents, or explain to their friends why having two houses really isn’t that great.

For Evan, the change was even more profound.  A new house? Having my quiet morning time disrupted by two new siblings? Can I bring all my toys? They better not play with my toys!

Getting married again was the easy part. Krista and I experience life in the same stride. We have those unspoken moments together; a look, a mutual feeling, then acknowledgement through smiles.  I know that we will get through anything and everything together as a couple, and I love sharing our life adventures together.

Blending a family? That’s the tricky part. For us, it was important to involve the kids in the wedding. We chose a small wedding at an out of town destination resort so they would have memories of the weekend away. We decided to have Clare and Grady walk me down the aisle, while Evan walked Krista down the aisle. And we also created vows specifically from the two of us to all three kids as part of the ceremony.

There will be many ups and downs over the next few years, perhaps not unlike any other family of five, blended or otherwise. And I think we got off to a great start during our wedding this past May. After the ceremony when Krista and I walked up the stairs, we knew the kids would be following closely behind.  And in true unscripted fashion, all three kids locked hands as they made their way up the stairs.  Their three smiling faces when they reached the top will be forever etched in our memories.  This is our new life, and we couldn’t be any happier!


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